HOUSE OF ROBERTS BLOG

I think one of the most underrated skills that a dad has to have is the ability to get back up. I’m not talking about physically, I’m referring to the ability to pick yourself up after failing at something…Specifically when you blow it as a husband or a father. For me, I love being a dad. It’s one of my favorite things I get to do, but it is also something that I find myself failing at a lot. Have you ever had one of the moments with one of your kids where after it you think to yourself, “Well that moment is going to come up in a therapist chair for them someday.” I know I have thought that! It’s those moments that knock you down and when that happens you have two choices, you can stay down or you can get back up.

Staying down means that you have allowed that discouragement to keep you from apologizing and getting better. Staying down is bringing things into your life that distract you from focusing on what you need to grow in. Staying down is medicating yourself in some way so that you don’t feel that moment of failure. Have you ever found yourself there before Dad? It’s not a good place to be, and the scary thing is if you stay down there long enough you will start to get comfortable there.

However, that is not what God has for you and that is not what your family needs from you. They need a dad who is tough, and not just physically but one who has a resilient spirit that when he fails, he doesn’t stay down, he gets back up. Proverbs 24:16 says, “For though a righteous man may fall seven times, he still gets up...” If you have made Jesus the Lord of your life then you are righteous and that means that God’s spirit dwells inside of you so that you can get back up, even when you fall.

Getting back up is owning what you did or didn’t do and apologizing for it. I can’t tell you how many times I have had to look my children in the eyes and apologize for yelling or overacting to something they did, but that is necessary. Getting back up is realizing the areas that you are struggling in as a man and growing in that area. That may mean reading some books or listening to some podcasts; it probably means that you need some mentorship and accountability in that area as well. Getting back up is recognizing what you use to cope when you are discouraged (i.e. media, porn, drinking, etc.) and getting rid of it or staying away from it. Getting back up also recognizes that you can’t do this on your own, it requires a dependency on God and the help of the Holy Spirit. If you could do it on your own, you would have already done it but the truth is you can’t and that is okay. You weren’t meant to do this on your own anyway, so stop trying. Submit to the discipline and the leading of the Holy Spirit in your life, and watch how He helps you get back up.

Getting back up is tough at the beginning, but keep at it, and over time you will find yourself having built the necessary muscles, discipline, and partnership with the Holy Spirit to get back up with ease. There is so much more that God has for you Dad, and what He needs from you right now is to get back. Get up. Don’t stay down. Get back up. I know it seems hard. Get back up. I know it feels like you can’t do it. Get back up. I know you think that you don’t know how. Get back up. Don’t quit. Don’t give up. There is too much at stake, and there is much that God has for you to do. Get back up, Dad. You can do it!